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Love Addiction and Sex Addiction: Whats the difference?

Some believe sex and love addiction are one and the same- not true.


Here is a brief summary outline for you to contrast the differences.


Similarities (sex addiction vs. love addiction)

A. Both are intimacy disorders

B. There is a compulsive cycle of seeking external validation- & attempt to
compensate, soothe, and regulate emotions

C. Same Core Issues

1. Impaired self esteem/carried shame from childhood

2. Impaired boundaries (too rigid/walled off-- or too open/enmeshed)

3. Difficulty with reality; moderation; balance

4. Addiction/dependency rooted in early developmental/attachment issues


Differences (sex addiction vs. love addiction)
 

      Sex Addict                                       Love Addict

1) Sexual activities/fantasies used to soothe/comfort self through sexual obsession; porn/masturbation/ Voyeurism/etc.
 

2) Compulsive sexual cycle used to escape unpleasant feelings
 

3) Focus/obsession on sexual pleasure w/o significant relationship- bonding/closeness not important
 

4) Compulsive cycle manifested around ritualized sexual behavior/fantasies OR sexual anorexia?avoidance or excessive control over sexual behavior


 

5) Shame/despair?intensified once the sexual cycle of acting out is complete ("See, I really am a bad, unworthy person")

1) Relationship/Romance fantasies used to soothe/comfort self through obsession of one "magical" person; who mate ?could' be, or ?made up' to be
 

2) Compulsive relationship cycle used to escape unpleasant feelings
 

3) Focus/obsession is on one significant relationship/person- ultimate bonding important; prone to stay in toxic relationship
 

4) Compulsive cycle manifested around seeking and/or keeping one relationship; avoiding abandonment/rejection, fantasy of person (or anorexia-avoidance of relationship)

 

5) Shame/despair?intensified when rejected/abandoned/relationship loss ("See, I really am a bad, unworthy person")


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